To Super Bowl or not to Super Bowl

Today is the day, the Super Bowl. I have been sitting in quiet contemplation ever since the division championships, wondering whether or not I would watch. Seems like a simple decision, but some things are not so simple. In fact, some things are filled with an overwhelming serving of excitement, bitterness, sadness, anger, and confusion.

With Diva Daughter at Seahawks game in San Diego.

I used to be both a Patriots and a Seahawks fan. Then I gave up the Patriots because I find many of the diehard fans unsavory and I didn't want to be pooled with people like that (this was at the height of Deflategate). The Seahawks was a married family adoption. All of the wasband's family are Seahawks fans. We've even been to Seahawks games together as a family.

I love the city of Seattle. I have loved it since the moment I first visited it in 1999. I even set a series of romance novels in Seattle. So it wasn't a stretch for me to fully embrace the Seahawks as my team. As if it was meant to be, I became a 12 and I loved every second of it.

Then the husband hurt me deeply and became a wasband. I chose to let the Seahawks go for my emotional well-being. I just couldn't root for a team that he has loved since their inception. In fact, I stepped away from football almost completely after we split because it was something we enjoyed together. It wasn't until last year, with a healed heart and soul, I started watching the game again, not with affection for any specific team, but sometimes choosing to root for teams based on girlish factors:

Is one of the coaches hot? I'll root for that team.

Which team has the better uniforms? That's my team this game.

Is one of the teams wearing purple? Oh, hell yeah, that's my team.

This game, I'll root for whatever team does not have an animal for a mascot.

And sometimes, I root for both teams because it is just good football.

I have found that not having a team has made football much more enjoyable. Then the division championships were closing in and I found myself hoping for a Broncos vs. Seahawks Super Bowl.

The Broncos because my oldest son loves them. The Seahawks so I could root against them as a spiteful gesture in honor of the wasband.

Alas, that was not the case and I found myself in a dilemma. Do I watch? Because I don't want either team to win. At the same time, I do want the Seahawks to win, but if they win, the wasband will be happy and I never wish that upon him. (Yes, I'm still a little bitter because of how deeply he hurt me. I own it and I am ok with it.)

And then came the announcement that Jon Bon Jovi will be introducing the Patriots. A Jon Bon Jovi sighting on live TV? How can I miss that?

I took this issue to the chat with my witchy soul sisters. I explained my dilemma over the Seahawks in a voice message because it was too difficult to put into written words and make it make sense. What I got was validation, encouragement, and the kind of love you only get from soul sisters who not only get you, but accept you 1000%.

It was the message and hilarious insults I needed to help me make a decision about the game. I will be watching and I will take up my mantle as a 12, cheering on the Seahawks.